HI Erika,
No words to say - just thinking about you and your struggles. I'm sorry for all that you are faced with - you have endured more than your share of difficult times. You truly are amazing - even when you don't feel it!
I just sent the first donation from the Tupperware Fundraiser - we've raised $75 so far, but I'm hoping for lots more!
I am thinking about you today.... I am so sorry that things are so difficult for you. None of this is your fault. You are an amazing Mother and have incredible grace and strength. I have a child with Mito and I know it is hard. I pray that you have peace today, and every day. No one knows what it is like to be in your shoes, all I can do is pray for you. I wish I lived closer and that I could just come by and give you a hug! Melissa
You are an amazing mom. Sending prayers your way for you and your family.
It makes me sick that they told you its your fault! Cathing itself is risky for sending infection right to the bladder! Some doctors are so dumb. Praying for this latest fight, that you have the energy to keep fighting as well!
NO ONE knows what it is like being in your shoes! You are one AMAZING woman....nurse....friend....wife....and MOM! Please just know you are being prayed for by SO MANY..and also your sweet Eme...and family back in CO.
We love you!
My heart goes out to you... One day at a time, that's all you can do, see each day through and know that you are doing the very best you can. Do not allow yourself to feel guilty about ANYTHING. You have done the equivalent of moving mountains through this experience. Love the idea of the cookbook fundraiser - it's a great way to contribute and I know personally I think they would be great gifts as well! Hugs, prayers, and only positive thoughts for you. Please do not forget to take care of yourself.
Love, Hugs & Prayers from here...
Just stopping in to send my love and prayers! I will send a longer email to you.
Hugs,
Jennifer
Don't listen to the doctors regarding the issue of not doing the cather 4 times a day while on vacation. The important thing to remember was the good times and memories that you all had as a family together... Which is much more important than anything else you could, would or should have done regarding Eme's medical issues. You were all given a very special week, enjoy those memories.
I check your blog every time I get on the computer (which is way too often). I wish there was something more I could do than pray for your family. But, I will try and pray very hard! I've never had a really sick kid, so I can't fathom what you deal with every minute of every day. I can't imagine how hard it must be. I wish I could think of something encouraging to say... I just didn't want to read your post and not say something!
Hello Erika
From a mom who has walked in your shoes. I think it is best that you take little Eme home.
To enjoy life all of you as a family!
I am praying for you, all of you.
From a mom who has been there
Erika,
I know we have never met and yet I hold you and Eme so dear and near in my heart. I speak of Eme with my husband as if she were our dear friends child...and although I know you and Eme through your writings and through the beautiful pictures you share...know that you are dear to us.
I wish I had the magical words for you to make everything better. I rarely type much more then that you are in our thoughts and prayers simply because I know that I don't have the words.
You are an amazing mother with an amazing Warrior Princess. You are also human. I have read your words and I know they don't even come close to describing the "realness" of what you have had to survive in the last 2 years ... I also know that in every letter, every word, every sentence - through ups and downs, through joy and heartache, through happiness and frustration One thing and One thing is so evident and that is the love you share for all of your children.
Sending you our love and prayers.
Always in our hearts,
Ana and Savannah (LF)
www.CotaForSavannahA.com
Erika and family,
I'm sorry to read about this new resistant infection. I can't help with this issue. But, as a friend and fellow LF mom....I can say I understand guilt, regret, trying to be everything and hoping for the very best, most perfect miracle! I'm praying for you every day. I pray for Emerson, and the whole family. You guys are living the toughest journey and many are praying for you each step of the way. Hang in there.....we love you! We believe in YOU! YOU are an unbelievably strong person and the most giving and selfless mother. I want to be you when I grow up! I love you even though we haven't met. I love Eme and see her eyes in my mind and have to pray for her. May God heal this infection, strengthen Eme and you and be the source of continued strength, endurance, and peace to your family. I wish so much I could hold you in my arms for a while and just bring you a great coffee with some treats! I wish and pray more than anything for God to be the Healer for Emerson, the Mighty Physician to assist her doctors in wisdom and the Wonderful Comforter to you and Jim.
Hugs, Love, Prayers and Blessings to you,
Love, Cindy
Erika,
No matter what you do there will inevitably be some regrets. They go along with love and commitment. Please know that those of us who have been there during Eme's journey but have ultimately lost our children still understand where you are right now. It is a fight everyday to make things better because that is what we do...we work to make things better for our little ones. This doesn't mean we aren't human and don't get frustrated at times with the process. I hope that everyone who reads this entry realizes what a great organization COTA is.
Be blessed my friend-
Kristi Cole
www.carepages.com
Carepage Name-brodyjcole
Erika,
Like everyone else who loves you and cares about you, I wish I had the words to ease your pain. The one thing I do know is that you cannot allow yourself to do any self-blaming. You are an unbelievable mother. You are torn in a million directions every single moment and you do the best to meet everyones needs (without even having the time or opportunity to meet your own) You are human and you are only one person...it's physically impossible to do it all but yet you still keep trying out of love and devotion to your family. Please don't allow anyone make you doubt yourself. You did not cause any of this. All you have done is be the very best mother and the very best person that anyone could ever ask for. I am praying for you and Eme nonstop!!! You deserve peace!
All my love,
Lauren
Praying for you all
Dear, dear Erica,
I of course have no answers we all so desperatly wish were available for you. After the tears, and wondering how anyone could help you, I remerber what has been so amazing in Eme's journey and it heartened me. So I share for reinforcement (what you already know)in hopes it will re-energize you. Emerson has shown us beyond belief an incredible ability to survive through all odds (statistically). I credit this to the power of prayer but also because of an incredible Mommy which she knows is there for her. So Erica I pray for your revitilization and for the checkers to move into a new possiblity we could never have dreamed of.
With love and prayer,
Anne
I wish I knew the right words to say, dear Erika. But I do know that this latest problem is NOT your fault...oh, my gosh to even think that! You have been the most incredible person, mother, and advocate that all of us have probably ever known. You ARE human, too. There is no way that you should ever doubt or regret any decision you have made. There are some things one just cannot control and has to put into God's hands. You are also so, so tired and that surely makes everything even worse. I can understand you not being able to sleep, but do what you can to get some much needed rest....that would also be helpful for Eme to have her Mommy not so exhausted.
Thanks for the list of fundraisers, etc. Good ideas!
TAKE CARE.....prayers, prayers for both of you...and strength. Annette W
Erika,
YOU did not cause Eme's bladder infection. Eme's bladder infection was caused by the fact that almost nothing in her body works properly. And that is not your fault. How disgusting that anyone would put the blame on you for her current state.